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Sunday, November 25, 2012

Moody Christmas

I have been in a weird mood for about a week now... I know it's my heart and head going into defense mode, so as to protect themselves from the constant emotional roller coaster that this military life has put me on. This has all happened before, during Justin's training, when he was coming and going often...although that wasn't nearly as difficult and didn't last as long as this is going to. Whew!

I have been trying to be in a happy mood and enjoy Justin while he's here. But it's hard, knowing that he'll just be leaving again. He says he likes it better like this, so he at least gets to see us some...but I disagree. I'd prefer he was gone for a few months then home for a few months. This is just pure torture! As soon as I adjust to him being home, he's gone again! I feel like my head is spinning sometimes.

In other news...we booked our plane tickets to fly back home to visit for Christmas, but had to change them. Go figure. It's not a big deal, we did have to pay more though. Ah well. What can ya do?

I can't wait to visit my big family. I can't wait for everyone to meet Brooklynn, and see how beautiful and smart Avery is getting. I am excited to spend time with some of the people I love most, doing fun Christmasy things together. I may even be excited to see some snow...maybe. But traveling at Christmas is always kind of bittersweet for me. I want to be with my family. I also want to be with my husband. But he (understandably) wants to be with his family, too. So I always feel kind of torn. This year is a little different, too, because he has been gone so much. And as soon as we get home from our trip we have a few days together, then he leaves for a month to train. Always training.

I'm hoping and praying with all my might that he will be home from his deployment next year in time for us to have our own Christmas. I'll miss being with my family; but I am so excited to have a relaxing Christmas in my own home with my husband and our sweet daughters. We never even get a tree because we're always leaving, so it will be really fun to decorate with Avery next year! Start some of our own traditions :)

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